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Elvira, Mistress of the Dark

Everyone knows who Elvira is, but did you know she made a totally cheesy horror movie in the 80’s?  I hesitate to even define it as ‘horror’ because it’s so campy, and not in the least bit scary or gory.  It definitely isn’t a “good” movie, but I love it.  Some of the co-stars include Edie McClurg (the secretary from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off), Jeff Conaway (Grease), Kurt Fuller (Zachariah from Supernatural, and a million other things) and cameos from Jambi and Miss Yvonne from Pee Wee’s Playhouse!

Overall, this is a fun movie that is great to watch with a group, although if a lot of people are talking you will probably miss a lot of the one-liners.  The real gem is at the end, where Elvira raps and twirls the tassels on her bra without her hands.  Pure magic.

Main course:  There is a scene where Elvira makes some really horrifc looking stew, so how about some Vegan Beer Cheese Soup?  It certainly doesn’t look horrific, but it’s cheesy just like this movie.

Side dish:  Since this movie is cheesy AND corny, why not make some cornbread croutons for your soup?  Simply make your favorite vegan cornbread recipe (I often veganize the recipe on the cornmeal container by using almond milk and a flax seed egg), cut it up into crouton sized pieces, toss with a little oil, and either pan-fry them or bake them at 350 until they are golden brown and crispy.

Dessert:  When in doubt, go with the obvious:  tittycakes!  Elvira is not shy about her rather large breasts, so don’t be shy about piling a cupcake (black cocoa powder with make it darker to match her soul) with a rounded mound of vanilla buttercream.  You can use a variety of things to make the nipple; you can dye a little of the buttercream pink and add a dollop, use a cherry, some sort of red candy, whatever.



posted: 11 October 4
under: 80s, comedy, horror, so bad it's good, teen

10 Responses to “Elvira, Mistress of the Dark”

  1. Erin says:

    “Not good” movies are always the best movies!

  2. ZuckerBaby says:

    Love this movie! Love the menu! I’d probably add a starter of mini hot dogs, as an ode to the Elvira driving cross-country montage 😀

  3. jessy says:

    most fantastical = “Elvira raps and twirls the tassels on her bra without her hands”.

    i’m sold.

    titty cakes with nipples = brilliant and awesome. yay!

  4. Hey Katie, thanks for the link love! Oddly enough I never watched the movie, but I did dress up as Morticia once and everyone thought I was supposed to be Elvira and I was super annoyed because I looooved Morticia. Totally going to watch this now!

  5. Megan says:

    I wonder if Elvira uses a bump-it like Snookie.

  6. supercarrot says:

    i don’t remember ever watching this movie, but i do remember seeing the tassel twirls! she is one of my favorite vegan celebrities. <3 i really must make some time to watch the movie.

  7. amey says:

    ha ha, excellent! I LOVE elvira and I love her totally awesome movie. I haven’t seen it in years, but you have rekindled my love. Must seek it out!

  8. Cara says:

    You just seriously brought me back to being 9 and loving Elvira! AND tittycakes??? bahahahaha!!! The best thing I have seen yet!

  9. Mo says:

    Ha! This menu is as fabulous as Elvira’s titties!

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